Struggles throughout high school; The product of a young parent.

I was thinking today about all the struggles I had during my high school years. Recently, I had a very big argument with my mother, and I realized that many of the struggles I  face today are because all the mistakes she made during my childhood. I have been doing some serious soul searching lately, and I decided to forgive her for her selfishness. However, I wonder if she knows how hard it is to live in such unstable environments, of course , I am not the only person who has gone through this, and I am sure I wont be the last.  For as long as I can remember, we lived in my grandfather’s house, she has never really made enough money to live on her own and maintain a home, so we moved from place to place for quite some time. I had two step fathers and really never had a space of my own. When I was 15 my grandfather kicked my mom out of the house because he felt that she was taking advantage of him and his generosity. We ended up living at a 300 sq. foot modified bedroom that had an exterior door ( an efficiency). It was my mother, sister, and myself; I had to share a bed with my mom because there was no room for another bed. I would have never imagined that I would be living in such a horrible situation. I had just started high school and I was finally beginning to explore with my sexuality, and, essentially I was in the stage where I was trying to adapt to school and the changes happening to my body. This continued for quite some time. I was not doing well in school and I fell into a constant sadness. Although, I am a very happy person and am generally cheerful I could not continue school this way. My aunt was able to help me financially, and I was able to graduate from private high school. I realize today how unstable my mother is and how I know the sacrifices I am making today will change my future tomorrow. I know my mom had me at an age where she was not ready to have a child. Subsequently, she raised a child in the only way that she could, and because she had not been able to finish her education she could not give herself or me a better life. I share this story not because I want you to pity me but because I want to share my experience and how a young unprepared mom can seriously hurt her future and her kids  by having a child at the wrong time. Finish school and have your life in order before you decide to bring a child of  your own into the world.

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